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Natal Venus conjunct Mars experiences?
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james_m



Joined: 05 Dec 2011
Posts: 3418
Location: vancouver island

Posted: Mon Jun 10, 2019 11:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

donna chang,

my mom had the same set up - venus/mars conj in leo with sun in cancer and moon in aries.. check june 22 1927.. she had scorpio rising and moon at the beginning of aries conjunct jupiter-uranus.. she wasn't the same though with the characteristics you describe your mom having.. and, i think venus-mars conjunction played a minor part in her personality as well as you note..

tanit

your friend has mars conjunct the north node which would be a factor feeding more strongly into anger issues.. also moon applies to mars and separates from venus - so maybe some of that feeds into the anger too - moon applying to mars..moon in the 8th square mars/node sounds like the sexual abuse a bit.. also interesting is the 3 inner planets on the inside of pluto-saturn duo.. venus is close to the midpoint at 22.. venus rules 12/7..
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Tanit3333



Joined: 12 Jul 2017
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Posted: Tue Jun 11, 2019 12:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

James - I agree about the NN and Moon, which is why I mentioned it in my post. I don't see the Venus/Mars conjunction being on its own significant for anger either. Most of the people I have met with it are egalitarian and keep their anger under control for the most part, even if it does exist. I can certainly express anger with my words when I am provoked, as do most people, but I have Mercury conjunct Mars and Mars in Aries. I would not blame Venus for that.

I actually have known a few Venus/Mars conjunction people fairly closely. I have a longtime previous coworker acquaintance-ish friend with it in Virgo too and he is in touch with his feminine side but still quite masculine. We were never great friends and I think it was in part sexual tension. I always thought he was oddly attractive but not in the conventional sense. Most people would describe him as "cool" in that he was confident and witty and a bit dark. He tried to give me his phone number several times, and looked at me in sexual ways sometimes, and was in general very sexual and women seemed to like him, as well as gay men (he mentioned being hit on a lot by men). He got along well with women and had many female friends. I found him entertaining and funny but he was immature, and I seemed to make him nervous even though he was normally confident but I think it was my own Moon-Saturn square t squaring his Moon-Uranus to Venus/Mars that made him feel judged by me and he found me uptight (rightly so since I am nothing like him). He also has a Moon-NN conjunction opp Uranus, since we are on the subject. He enjoyed drinking/partying and loud, outlandish people, and was iconoclastic, probably in part due to Uranus and NN with the Moon link. I always sensed some volatility that he did not display at work, but obviously Venus/Mars is not to blame (although Mars itself is in hard aspect with Moon and Uranus, so that is something to note). I think in his case Venus softened his very rough edge a little bit and probably helped keep him out of trouble. I normally think of the Virgo conjunction in males who are more fastidious and like to keep physically fit and are organized and like more conventional women and that was true for him. He exercised religiously and was very organized and good with his hands. I always said he could be a good surgeon and his father was a pathologist (MD), which can also explain in part the 4th house influence. Venus/Mars is oriental but nocturnal so a bit "robust" and "debilitated" at the same time, I guess, since Simmonite doesn't talk about this scenario.

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Donna Chang



Joined: 24 Feb 2012
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Location: San Francisco

Posted: Tue Jun 11, 2019 5:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

James,
That's my mother's birthday Shocked
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Tanit3333



Joined: 12 Jul 2017
Posts: 820

Posted: Tue Jun 11, 2019 7:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How would you guys describe the conjunction in Leo relating to romantic matters, since that is such a common interpretation? Did they have any particular talents that might be explained? My mother also had Mars in Leo (squared by Venus in Scorpio) and she was in dance competitions in her youth and enjoyed attention, especially from men. She also married very young (I think 16) but cheated on both of her husbands and became more promiscuous in her 20s. I do often think of Mars in Leo as pretty sexually needy without other factors, but she did have Moon with NN, and that can show a needy person. Her Mars was oriental though whereas your mothers would have occidental placement, which is more feminine.

James - your mother had day Venus/Mars, so I am curious how that played out. Was it in her 10th then? If Mars ruled her chart then the conjunction probably explained partnership too. The conjunction also would have probably been more significant for her manners and appearance. An astrologer once told me that the conjunction in the 10th can show being able to get whatever you want if you set your mind to it. I have felt that way at times regarding 10th house matters. The astrologer had a mother with it and said she "conquered" her bachelor father, who no woman could tie down, which I found funny (and a waste of such energies, if that is true - if you could conquer whatever you want, there are many other things worth achieving). With my own conjunction in Aries, it often draws in males who are used to a lot of attention from women but find me unwilling to give them any and they like the challenge of it, which I find boring and predictable. I end up ignoring their advances and they then end up infatuated with me.

It is funny that we have Uranian Moon moms. My father was also a Uranian Sun and so am I. I actually really love the planet Uranus in most cases but don't think the energy mixes very easily with the luminaries in hard aspect, especially without other factors to help keep it under control. My mother's was opp Mercury also and had severe learning disabilities and difficulty concentrating and dropped out of high school.
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Donna Chang



Joined: 24 Feb 2012
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 1:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow, a lot to think about here. Whenever I try to describe my mother to people I find myself down the rabbit hole. James mentioned his mom sounds different, and my first thought was, "lucky then!" but with maturity and hindsight and distance (she died 4 years ago) I can feel sympathy and tenderness, and she was not a tender person. As I said, I am fairly sure she was autistic as her mental health issues didn't follow the "usual" patterns, and she stymied doctors and defied diagnosis in 1966.

Again, not knowing her birth time except that it was a day birth, her mars/venus in leo was loud and opinionated and yes, she married very young but stayed married, although complaining constantly about her husband. At the same time she WAS very needy and if she had been out in the world more I bet she would have had an affair. She didn't have any artistic talent but appreciated it. She was extremely reticent around anyone outside her large family. She did have a job in the medical field as a transcriber--her only education was "secretary school" but she retained a lot of information and stayed pretty healthy her entire life with self-diagnosis.
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james_m



Joined: 05 Dec 2011
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 1:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

donna chang,

my dads birthday is nov 16 1927... does your dad share that birthdate too? lol....

tanit,

my mom would have had saturn rising like me, but without the addition of the moon in the ascendant... i think this coloured her world to quite a degree... she had a lot of planets in fire.. including the outers - 7 in fire and 3 in water... no earth and no air.. she was fiery too.. but there was a sun in the 8th house conj north node that was also an important part of her psychology.. she would like to work from behind the scenes, as opposed to doing a direct assault... the truth is my mom led a very hard life and it is hard for me to be objective about her... i am not sure how she worked thru her challenges, but i know she was a strong lady who surmounted the many obstacles she had to face.. my dad was other worldly and not into keeping up with the jones in any way whatsoever..

i am not really answering your question and not sure i can say much about her in any objective way.. my mom was attractive and i am sure she would have been able to start another relationship after my dad died ( 1985), but although she went out, she liked living alone, after all the trails she had with my dad.. she dressed well, as did my dad and this meant a fair amount to her... appearances meant a lot to her.. i always used to challenge her on this front saying it didn't matter.. i have my saturn on the same degree as she did - she had me on her saturn return almost exact.. i loved my mom, but i had to create some space between her and i over the course of growing up..

my brother has a bit of the energy my mom had in the sexual appeal dept..he has a wide conjunction of venus-mars in sag.. both my sister and i have a trine between venus-mars which i think is easier in many regards.. venus-mars conjunct has sex appeal.. in leo i think this is definitely the case.. but with my mom it was buried underneath a lot of other astro factors that would have weighed more heavily... it is kinda hard for me to talk about my mom astrologically for some reason.. i think it has to do with my own energy almost entirely.. i think on some level i am still processing my mom, although she has been gone since 2002.. sorry i can't offer more..
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Donna Chang



Joined: 24 Feb 2012
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 1:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Forgot to say, I think the mars/venus was the way to make her happy--if you kept her entertained she liked you. If, like me, you were a quiet intellectual type she didn't trust you.
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Tanit3333



Joined: 12 Jul 2017
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 4:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for sharing your personal information on your moms. I am estranged from my own mom for about 10 years now, so I understand keeping a distance. I normally do not look at my mom's chart much but whenever I do I see many influences that remind me why it was probably best to cut ties.
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Donna Chang



Joined: 24 Feb 2012
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Location: San Francisco

Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 4:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tanit3333 wrote:
Thanks for sharing your personal information on your moms. I am estranged from my own mom for about 10 years now, so I understand keeping a distance. I normally do not look at my mom's chart much but whenever I do I see many influences that remind me why it was probably best to cut ties.


There were certainly times I thought I had to leave to keep my sanity, and one of my sisters, the eldest child and a taurus, did cut all ties. It's a bit of a lost cause to understand your parents. One more quality on the mars/venus conjunct in leo that James referred to--my mother always looked like she could step into a movie no matter what she was doing. Even around the house she was impeccably pulled together, trim and tidy to the end of her life.
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james_m



Joined: 05 Dec 2011
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Posted: Wed Jun 12, 2019 7:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

tanit,

it really is great if one can be on the best of terms, especially with one's immediate family... i figure if we can't be this way with our own family, it is going to be much more challenging to come together on the planet with people who aren't a part of our immediate family.

however, i know how difficult this is too.. i am reading carlos santanas autobiography right now and half way thru.. he is a sun in cancer - trop or sidereal, and saturn/pluto also in cancer sidereal... he speaks about his relationship with his mom and how challenging it was for him.. in spite of this, he found a way to be at peace with his mom and obviously admired her for her many strengths.. i think one of the tricks in life is to take the good and try to leave or downplay the bad that we believe we see in others.. it makes life easier if we can do that..

i hope at some point you reconnect with your mom if she is still alive.. she probably had a long list of challenges that are reflected in some of the poor decisions that define some of your relationship with her... in spite of that, i think you'd benefit from reconciling with her if it is possible..one can forgive, even if one doesn't forget... good luck with it all..
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Tanit3333



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Posted: Thu Jun 13, 2019 11:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That is funny about the Leo conjunction showing being well dressed. I cannot speak for all Aries conjunctions but I am lucky if I shower every few days and brush my hair. I hate uncomfortable clothing and will almost never wear heels or have long nails (also because I play piano). I very rarely wear jewelry (maybe once per year) and usually wear minimal makeup unless it is a special occasion or if the moment strikes me.

James - I do not believe that just because someone is a family member means that you owe it to them to continuously allow them to infringe on your peace and happiness, and to relive the trauma of your upbringing (Pluto in the 4th, hitting all my angles). The older I get, the less I allow toxic people to remain in my life. I hear a lot of people tell me to make peace with my family members that I am estranged from, but they don't realize that I am a very perceptive and intuitive person and know what I am dealing with and what is best for me. Sometimes there is no peace, there is just acceptance. I think with Pluto in the 4th you have to destroy old patterns and move on or you will never move forward.
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james_m



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Posted: Thu Jun 13, 2019 6:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

tanit,

i admire your objectivity and search for peace, or in the absence of that - acceptance.. we all have to figure it out on our own of course..

i have pluto square the angles on my chart as well - from the 10th whole sign, or 9th placidus..
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Donna Chang



Joined: 24 Feb 2012
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Location: San Francisco

Posted: Fri Jun 14, 2019 3:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My sister who left the family also had pluto in the 4th house. The more you study astrology the more you realize the pointlessness of telling people what they "should" do. People like giving advice. I read one fun study that concluded virtually NOBODY actually acts on the advice of others, even when they acknowledge it's sense. I think that's because on some deep level we already know what we are meant to do.
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Tanit3333



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Posted: Fri Jun 14, 2019 7:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Interesting about your 4th house sister being similar regarding destroying the connection to move on. I have heard the same thing about advice and it is pretty obvious if you follow social media that few people are open to listening to others.

Pluto is a very powerful force in some charts and I do think in areas where it is really difficult it is better to destroy whatever is not working and either rebuild it from scratch if you can, or take a loss and move on. Otherwise with transits especially, you are going to keep repeating the same themes.
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