am i going through my saturn return? -aries

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Hello,
i apologise for posting new thread every day but this will be the last one.
here i would not like to ask you about other people or my relations ( synastry ) with others but about me.
I am aries born 21.03.1990 in Poland. Since I remember i have had struggles with relations. when i was 25 in 2015 i started realising and being more aware of my actions and my life. i got matured slowly.
i have no idea why it happened when i was 25.

a lot of my male friends have been attracted to me only with my body not with my mind.
i was nice, happy - they have all been thinking of me as a weak person.
a lot of my female friends have had dramas in their lives, were stronger mentally. they were bragging about work, finances.

i am a person who do not brag about work or finances because its obvious you do it and you dont have to show off.

so i was perceived as small naive and because of that weak . weak emotionally with no experiences. because almost all of my life i have had problems with men.

but i dont wanna talk about it here.
i wanna talk about my maturity. since 2015 i have put myself in some weird and strong environment of business and hard work. i tried my best an i was climbing the ladder of success to a way that needed to quit.

since 2015 i felt inner transformation, change that i am more aware of my life and my actions.
i feel also like a late bloomer a person who experiences things later. i dont know why.

the problem is that i realise this situation i try to change it but still do not know why.
i have worked a lot in many fields in the last 7-8 years but it has been very chaotic. since 2015 i got some kick in my mental 'a*ss" and i started maturing.

i feel i am more grounded, i still feel i am more capable of doing things.
before i was attracting many younger men now i attract people my age or older.
its because of my mind, of my way of talking and even my posture of expressions.

i do not wanna be perfect but i wanna change or realise to a way that i am aware of relationships.
its not funny for me not to be in one...

i was not ready mentally. before i was getting rejected and i have rejected many men. automatically and i didnt realise that.
that is why all the drama occured.

i post my natal chart to ask, what is going with me? i know i am saturnian person and my moon in cap doesnt help me..

i am not asking when i will find someone or when i will flirt with someone but actually when i will be able to form something.

my ideal thought is to change and to have the 1st second impression on my ex friends, ex boyfriends and etc to be able to show i have changed but im not sure it i wanna play that game to prove something to someone...

what do you think?

thank you.
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